The Grief Journey:
Stumbling in the Dark
In the weeks and months following our loss of someone who died by suicide, our emotional responses alternate with profound feelings of emptiness. It’s as if we are lost in some bleak, lonely landscape. We can see no direction to take, no path to select. We are living our life in a vacuum. One explanation for this sense of void is that we have lost our assumptive world. We assumed life would go on as we had been living it. We assumed things weren’t as bad as they were. We assumed we could fix things if we loved or worked or tried enough. We did not assume our loved one would end his or her life. But now our assumptions are shattered. At this point we don’t know what to think. In this interim between the shattering of our old assumptive world and the building of a new one, we often experience deep sorrow. We feel we have lost our identity. We often feel consumed by blame or guilt or anger. We may wonder if anything is ever going to be worthwhile again. Or we may just feel so very, very tired.