The 6th anniversary of my brother’s death is this coming Sunday. The best way I can think of to proactively deal with its arrival is to offer my own words of hope and healing to those who have recently lost someone.
First, I offer my sincerest and heartfelt condolences and sympathies. This experience is unlike any other. What I want you all to know is that despite the darkness and the void of your person’s absence, hope is never too far gone or too far out of reach. One of the most beautiful things I’ve come to realize is that no one’s ever really gone. We’re accustomed to their physical presence and the spaces they took up, but their energy is never gone. If you open your eyes, mind, and heart, you can still feel them around you – guiding you and telling you that it‘s going to be okay.
Will it ever be the same? No. Will you ever stop missing and looking for them? No. Yet, I look at my grief as an extension of my unrelenting love for my brother. The tears I still cry, the pain I still feel, and the absolute longing, are just testaments of that love. They allow memories to surface, wrapping me in their warmth, and reminding me how much Josh will always mean to me.
This experience is not a ’one size fits all.’ It looks and feels different to each person, but there is one thing we all have in common … our love for the person. That will never fade or leave us, no matter how much time passes by.
I leave you all with this sentiment- a heart that hurts is still a heart that beats hard and strong. Give yourselves time, love, and compassion. Be gentle with your heart. It’s been through a lot. It needs your love now more than ever.
Love and light always.