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Because Nice Matters
Grief Journey

Because Nice Matters

InPeaces: “Since I found out about Max I have somehow managed to encounter–mostly-all kind people. I work as a server and encounter lots of people at my job. Usually, about 75% are pretty decent, but the other 25% make my job hard. These past few days have been good, after almost a month of pain. These last 2 or 3 days,I’ve started to feel human again.

Then today, a woman at my table got impatient with me because I forgot to ring in her appetizer. She did that thing that people do when they are pissed at you and won’t even look at you when you apologize.

It made me want to cry. I’ve been trying hard to be kinder to people since this happened, because Max was kind, and because like I said earlier, you do not know what the people around you are going through.

I came back to the table after their late (and now free) appetizer got there. I stooped down to become eye level with this woman and gave her the sincerest apology that I could. After all, we still need to be kind to people even if they don’t always seemingly deserve it. Maybe she is going through her own things in life. And to my surprise she actually became much nicer after that. Nice Matters.”


Shelby: “This reminds me of our founder, Ronnie Walker, who runs this forum based on the motto, “Kindness Matters.” I’m glad you were able to remain kind in the face of your customer’s impatience, and so good that she finally reciprocated a little kindness back to you. I hope you continue to encounter kindness. We could all do with the reminder to keep spreading good will. Thanks for sharing.”


My Butterfly: I agree with you 100% @inpeaces. You never know what someone else is going through. When my husband died, I went to a flower shop with my friend. My friend and I worked together and our job required customer service. I was buying a single red rose to place on my husband’s grave. There is a sentimental reason that goes with my husband and a single red rose. This was very soon after he died and was buried, so my emotions were very raw. The flower shop employee was very rude and mean to me. It was so bad that my friend stepped in and reamed out the employee and explained why I was buying the rose. Then, the employee apologized, but I was still in tears.

Once we were back in the car, my friend told me she learned a valuable lesson there in the flower shop. She told me that she learned that you just never know what someone else is going through and for now on, she is going to nicer to her customers at work. I am always kind to people no matter what because of what I have been through in my life. I think going through this kind of trauma changes us and makes us aware of other people and their feelings. So I agree with you 100%. Kindness Matters, as Ronnie Walker says.”

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Wisdom From Our Community

"Wisdom From Our Community" posts originally appeared on the Alliance of Hope Forum for Suicide Loss Survivors and are reprinted with the permission of the authors. Our online forum transcends time and distance, offering a culture of kindness, hope, and understanding to people who have lost loved ones to suicide. Operating like a 24/7 support group, our forum is supervised by a mental health professional and moderated by a trained team of loss survivors. Members can read and comment, share their stories, and connect with other suicide loss survivors.Read More »