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Out of Nowhere

I thought that being 2 1/2 years out from my fiancé’s death, the meltdowns were over.

Well……….WRONG!!!!

I have no idea what happened or what triggered this. I was just driving home from Wendy’s, with a Caesar side salad, when it just came over me –the pressure in the chest. I was not able to breathe. Thank goodness I was almost home. By the time I pulled into my parking space, I was sobbing so badly I could hardly figure out how to get out of my car and inside. It has been months since I had this kind of meltdown. I really thought this was behind me, but I see that it is not.

I guess between the crying spells, I will try and figure out what has triggered this. I think maybe it is just the fact that I miss him so much and am so lonely for him. At this moment, my heart is breaking all over again. How many times can the heart be broken and still survive?

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From Our Forum

From Our Forum

The Alliance of Hope online forum transcends time and distance, offering a culture of kindness, hope, and understanding to people who have lost loved ones to suicide. Operating like a 24/7 support group, our forum is supervised by a mental health professional and moderated by a trained team of loss survivors. Members can read and comment, share their stories, and connect with other suicide loss survivors.Read More »